What to do with our wayward Governor

What do we do with our wayward Governor? Call for his resignation? Forgive him when he apologizes?

This past week’s admission by Gov. Mark Sanford that he’s had an affair and was out of the country entertaining his selfish desires could hardly have done more damage to this state than a 100-foot storm surge or hurricane with 200 miles-per-hour sustained winds. The collective sound of the intake of breaths when Sanford said, “I’ve been unfaithful…” linger. It is unclear when the exhale will take place.

We were all reminded during this past Friday morning’s cabinet meeting, an attempt to show his control of all things South Carolina, that he had been traveling the state’s coast just the week before, discussing with various community leaders whether the state is ready for the coming hurricane season.

Betrayal. Lies. Lust. Love. Hate. Humiliation. Honesty. Hope. The emotions are many and real. We were all betrayed and lied to, at times by the Governor, at times by ourselves and at others by those who seek to capitalize on this political moment. The 2010 election is arriving all too soon. As citizens and voters and human beings on this leg of this journey together, we all share in the humiliation the truth brings. And in the hope it will set us free.

To move forward, I suggest we take a note from this online commentary: “Don’t get outraged at Sanford,” posted this past week on CNN.com. The comments by Peter Bregman, who, among other things, writes a weekly blog For HarvardBusiness.org, go like this:

“It’s easy to get outraged at Gov. Mark Sanford’s actions ... rather than outrage, we should empathize with Sanford ... the world is full of fallible human beings struggling to live their lives ... Hold Sanford accountable with compassion, not pitchforks ... We all have a lens that pre-determines how we view the world.” These lenses, Bregman writes, is why we look at Sanford and see whatever it is we see, whether, a sad, pathetic man struggling with his passions or a power-hungry, rich playboy who wanted it all and got caught.

Bregman continues: “We read the papers, watch the news channels and appreciate the opinions that confirm our biases ... the outrage is understandable, because Mark Sanford did something he shouldn’t have done ... We could all agree, I think, that he should not have abandoned the state for several days, he should not have lied about where he was, and he should not have been unfaithful to his wife. But save your outrage for Iran or Darfur, for situations where people are being tortured and trampled and killed.”

And that’s the kicker. As despicable as all this has been, this isn’t the worst it could be. We trust all the Sanfords, in time, come to understand that truth. This is public. This is shameful. But from this, we can all recover. We have not lost our eyes, to never see again.

“We need to understand this situation for what it is: human weakness, poor judgment, personal longing and complicated relationships. The question is, how are we—each one of us personally—going to respond?” Bregman asks, then continues, “I’d like to make a suggestion: We should empathize.

“Regardless of what you think of his behavior, no matter how you feel about adultery, whatever your views of Mark Sanford as a politician or a person ... Don’t just empathize with Mark. Empathize with Jenny, his wife, and their boys. And with Maria … And with the people who are outraged… Try to truly understand, without judging anyone… “

For Bregman, the thing to remember is that it’s too easy to become a hypocrite, to have a standard for people we like and another for those we don’t, to judge one and excuse another ...
“He didn’t make one stupid decision. He made lots of small decisions that couldn’t be categorized as smart or stupid until, at some point down the road, it becomes one or the other … That’s how bad and good things happen.

“Ponzi schemes, affairs, embezzlements and also marriages, careers, wealth. Lots of little steps that slowly, over time, bring us to a place we may or may not have planned to be. A place that may be constructive or may be destructive.”

What do we do with a wayward Governor? As Nichol’s Rep. Jim Battle said, if there is misuse of public funds or the breaking or a law, action has to be taken.

Sanford has taken the first steps, however clumsy, at holding himself accountable.

As Sen. Kent Williams reminds us, deeds done in darkness will eventually come to light.

Each day, millions of decisions are made that build and have a cumulative effect on our lives and on others. We learn from our wayward Governor. Mark Sanford is guilty of putting his desires over his responsibilities. He executed bad judgment and it has cost us all.

This state did not quit functioning when this leader failed. It functions as we all press on, making wiser choices, better decisions, remembering to put others first and keeping ourselves in check. It is our collective responsibility to one another.